Christmas care package ideas for someone living with lupus

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If you're putting together a Christmas care package for someone living with lupus, start with what your friend enjoys and uses. A favorite drink, a meal they can warm up, or something to listen to can be a thoughtful place to begin.

I live with lupus, and I have things I reach for again and again. Some cost very little. Some are bigger purchases that I would want to choose for myself.

The gifts I appreciate make room for the day I'm having. They can save me a dish to wash, put something I need within reach, or give me something to enjoy while I rest.

Your friend's list may be different from mine. Ask what they like before you start filling a box.

Their favorite drinks with lids

I love having a drink with a lid that won't spill. When I'm spending time in bed, I want to be able to keep it nearby.

Bottled drinks also mean fewer dishes. I deal with nausea, and the drink I want can change. Having a few choices I already like is helpful for me.

For your friend, ask which drinks they want right now. Choose a small mix of those. If you want to give a reusable cup, ask whether they have one they like and whether washing it will add work.

A favorite drink can be the whole gift. You don't need to fill a large box to do something kind.

A meal in a container they can keep

I appreciate food that arrives ready to warm up. I also appreciate being able to keep or toss the container.

Returning dishes is one more thing to remember. A meal in a foil pan takes that step off the list.

Before you cook, ask what food works for them and when they would like it. Check how much space they have in the fridge or freezer. Then put the warming instructions on the container so they can find them when they need them.

You could bring one meal, a few portions, or something they can freeze. Let your friend tell you which would help most.

Soft sheets and lighting they can choose

I love soft sheets and lighting that helps me settle in. Those are things I enjoy while I'm resting at home.

If sheets are on your gift list, check the bed size and the fabric your friend likes. If you're choosing a lamp, ask where they would use it. Give them a chance to choose the light they want in that room.

These may be bigger gifts. I would ask before buying them, even if I felt sure they would be useful. Your friend knows what fits their home and their day.

A place to set the things they reach for

Sometimes I need more space than my nightstand gives me. I don't want everything crowded together or tipping over.

An extra side table is nice to have nearby. A drink tray can also give things a place to sit.

Before buying either, ask what space is available and what your friend wants within reach. They may already have a table they like. They may want help clearing a spot for it.

You can offer to set it up, too. Let them show you where they want it.

An audiobook or something to listen to

When my hands hurt, holding a book can be hard. I like being able to listen to a book instead.

Audiobook credits are a gift I would enjoy. Noise-canceling headphones are another thing I appreciate.

Ask which service your friend uses before buying credits or a gift card. You could also ask for the title of a book they've been wanting to hear. That makes the gift feel personal and helps you choose something they'll use.

A few personal things they enjoy

I enjoy things that smell good, like perfume, body spray, or lotion. Lip balm is another thing I like to keep close.

Scents are personal, so ask before choosing one for someone else. You could give a refill of something they already love. If they prefer products without a scent, follow that preference.

I also like face masks and nail polish. I have a tremor, so painting my own nails can be hard. For me, the gift would need to fit what I can enjoy with help.

Think about how your friend would use the item. Ask whether they want help using it, and let them choose when.

Offer help that has a clear next step

A care package can include help with the work around it. You can offer to put the food away, open a hard-to-open package, or set up a side table.

Be clear about what you're offering. “I can bring dinner on Wednesday and put it in the fridge” gives your friend something they can accept or change.

Keep visits flexible. Ask whether they want company or a drop-off. If the day changes, give them room to change the plan.

Put a care package together around your friend

Choose a favorite drink and one other thing they want. Add a note. If you're bringing food, tell them what it is and how to warm it up.

For a larger gift, let them help you choose it. That gives you both a chance to make sure it fits.

I love beautiful things, and I love things that help with the work of a hard day. Both can belong in a Christmas gift. I hope this gives you a place to start as you care for someone you love.